Revelation Within On the Go!

Quest for Pleasure or Hidden Idolatry: A Deeper Look

October 25, 2023 Heidi Bylsma-Epperson and Christina Motley Season 1 Episode 64
Revelation Within On the Go!
Quest for Pleasure or Hidden Idolatry: A Deeper Look
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Ready to have your perspective tilted and transformed? Join us on a deep-dive into the less-lit corners of our hearts as we explore the concept of idolatry in our latest episode of Revelation Within on the Go. We're not just talking about golden statues; we're talking about the subtle ways our daily choices and desires can morph into idols that control our lives. From the food we eat to the relationships we nurture, the quest for pleasure, and even our obsession with an easy life, we guide you through the minefield of these seemingly harmless pursuits.

We don't just unearth the problem, though. We are equipped to help you identify these hidden idols and provide effective strategies to overcome them. Our comprehensive list of criteria will illuminate the difference between a healthy reward and a sneaky idol. We'll emphasize the need for the things in our lives to be life-enhancing, meaningful, and joy-filled, all while being aligned with God's will. The heartening message underpinning our discussion is the profound truth that Jesus is the ultimate reward.

In the final segment of this enlightening episode, we grapple with the idol of thinness that plagues our society, leading to astronomical profits for the diet industry and undue pressure on individuals. We expose the toll chasing this ideal takes on our lives and how it distorts our self-perception. As we wrap up, we underline the potency of renewing our minds, the significance of setting boundaries, and the divine guidance of God's word. Join us in inviting God to help us lay down our idols, remain aligned with His word, and deepen our relationship with Him. The journey is eye-opening, the conversation is transformative, and you don't want to miss it!

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Speaker 1:

Hi and welcome to Revelation Within on the Goat. I'm Heidi Biles-Murafferson, one of your hosts and the owner and lead coach of the Revelation Within industry.

Speaker 2:

And I'm Christina Motley, your other host, also a Revelation Within coach and Heidi's partner in all things Revelation Within. We are so excited to have you here with us for this podcast episode of Revelation Within on the Goat. Where are we going today?

Speaker 1:

We're going into the land of idols oh, that's a whole topic. Golden idols or stone idols or anything like that. I mean the land of idolatry of the heart.

Speaker 2:

Wow, can we go back to talking about gratitude?

Speaker 1:

Have you ever heard that quote? It's attributed to John Calvin. The human heart is an idol factory churning out new idols, like the conveyor belt in a manufacturing plant rolling out new widgets Wow.

Speaker 2:

What do you think it's so true, it is our natural bent since the fall.

Speaker 1:

That is so totally true, and if we don't direct our hearts to bow before something or someone else will bow before our own ideas and our own machinations and our own flesh and our own everything Anyway, and that's still idolatry. For years, the idea of idolatry has come in and out of our thin within, and now Revelation Within materials. We've been asked about idolatry and obedience and we thought it was high time that we hit this one head on, and so this is kind of my working definition of an idol, and it may not meet the standards of a lot of people, but if you think about it really hard for any length of time, I think you'll see why I use it. The definition I've been using of an idol is anything or anyone that I give the right or privilege to direct my steps, to impacting my decisions. This may kind of be kind of vague, but think about it for a minute. If I refuse to let go of a relationship that God is leading me to let go of for some reason, maybe it's a toxic relationship that hasn't been healthy or godly. Maybe every time I'm with that person I struggle in some way to be obedient to the Lord, and what he's talking to that person may be an idol in my life and I am allowing my unwillingness to tear down that idol to direct my steps, to cause me to do and be and set things up in my calendar, and it's like wait a minute. If God is calling me to cut it off, then I need to cut it off or I have an idol going on in my life. Can you relate to that? Do you think that definition works for us?

Speaker 2:

Absolutely yeah, I think it's actually really a good one. I was thinking, as you were talking and reading it, I was thinking, okay, if I go through my day kind of a normal day, if I go through my day and I think what, who and what and where and what's going on in my day, where I'm saying, okay, you have the right, you have the privilege to direct my steps and impact my decisions, and I'm thinking about things on the internet, I'm thinking about things that I read or look at even for a minute. I'm thinking about coworkers, I'm thinking food.

Speaker 1:

I mean, if I can't resist or won't resist when I'm not hungry and there's something in the house that I want, or out of the house, you know, drive through. Maybe my taste buds are my idol.

Speaker 2:

Well, and I think that for me over the years, what I have kind of thought of as idols is what am I thinking about the most? And my thoughts. When I've kind of got margin in my day, where do my thoughts go? Do they go to people, do they go to worries, do they go to a to-do list, or does it go to something, something that I give a lot of time and energy and thought to? What is that? What is an idol in my life? It's challenging and it's definitely quickly convicting, because we struggle with this kind of thing all the time. We all do, we all do.

Speaker 1:

Right. I've heard it said that you can tell what your idols are by looking at two things. Of course, most of us don't use checkbooks anymore, but by looking at your spending. Yeah, I would go online, look at my bank account and what is everything going to, or my credit card account. You know that too. And then the second one is to look at your calendar. What do you spend your time doing? I love Psalm 119, verse 133. Of course, psalm 119 is super long and kind of is an exaltation of the word of God and its power in our lives. But this is that verse Psalm 119, verse 133. And the NIV reads direct my footsteps according to your word, let no sin rule over me. And that's kind of where I got that idea that an idol is anything that I let direct my steps. This, almost here, is inviting God to help him to have his footsteps only go where his word is leading him, and it's almost like there's a contrast set up. I don't know if he intended that or not, but let no sin rule over me. There's a choice I have God's word can direct me, god's spirit I'm going to say that too or sin. It's as simple as that.

Speaker 2:

We boil it down Well and you know when I think of idols, this is the other thing that comes to mind for me is reward. It's like we're looking for a reward, right? I mean, does that connect for you, Heidi?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I think so. I mean, when I think of idolatry, like of statues that people think are like gods or something like that. I'm not so sure that if it's that, but I don't have any connection with that kind of idolatry. Yeah, I think that what you just said is exactly right. Here in the good old US of A and maybe Canada and maybe others in other countries can relate to this it is pleasure, is even an idol. I mean, that's it. The easy life is an idol. I don't want any difficulty in my life and I can tell you this that my healing, in all of the areas that I have struggled with over the years, I believe it's kind of been delayed and prolonged. Let's say that prolonged because I have an idol of I don't want discomfort. I don't want to have any discomfort and it's uncomfortable to think about the traumas in my life, the challenges in my life that have triggered me to turn to other counterfeit comforts, like we talk about in our mission statement. If I don't want to be uncomfortable and it keeps me from doing the healing work that God wants me to do, from diving in with him, then that's definitely an idol and I'm placing that for the healing God promises me.

Speaker 2:

I think that so many of us deal with that very same thing. It's like I thought life was going to be so much easier than this, and isn't that what the world tells us? I mean, the world tells us, if you have this, your life will be easier. If you look this way, your life will be easier If you follow this five step plan. Your life will be easier If you follow this career path. I mean, the world tells us, here are all your tools to go to an easy life. And you know what? It's not easy, and nobody has an easy life, not even somebody who has all the material things. There are still worries, there is still illness, there's still struggle there, and I don't know that for me, and with a lot of the people that you know, you and I have coached Heidi I feel like there's this sense of but I'm supposed to have.

Speaker 1:

Yes.

Speaker 2:

I'm entitled to. You mentioned this yesterday in a text to me. Don't we all struggle with that? I thought I was supposed to get this. You know where's my reward, right?

Speaker 1:

The one that I struggle with a lot is it wasn't supposed to be this way.

Speaker 2:

Yes, you know, I've had my life and it wasn't supposed to be this way.

Speaker 1:

I can honestly tell you my first marriage was definitely an idol in my life. I know that's tricky, because God wants me to be totally sold out and committed to my marriage. Yeah To my husband, but I elevated it to such a place the marriage itself to such a place that I was willing to do all kinds of things to try to keep it together. When it was going south and those things God was not calling me to, I'm convinced now that I was allowing the man and the marriage to the man to be idols in my life, because my steps were being directed not by God's word. Sin was definitely ruling over me in an attempt to keep that whole thing together. So that I mean it's tricky at times, it really is tricky, because good things can become idols.

Speaker 2:

Things that are really good things, that actual gifts from God can also become idols. Pretty much my whole adult life I felt like did God put food on this earth to torture me? Because I am tortured every single day. And then, when I came to a time in my day when I had any margin at all whether it was a break at work or all the kids are busy at home and I have five minutes, or whatever it was my first thought was I'm going to eat some it really was for so many years, and that's why I think, too, that it helps me even now to stop. you know, at times during the day, and it's like wait a minute. When I have five minutes, what am I going to? What am I thinking?

Speaker 1:

about. That's a really good point. Yeah, that's a great way of noticing what are my idols. So we'll look at the checkbook or the bank account and the credit card statement, we'll look at our calendars and we'll look at what about those spare five minutes? Where do I go in my thoughts? Where do I go in my home? Do I zip into the drive through? I mean, that might be very telling.

Speaker 2:

Well, it was interesting. I was at doctor's appointment yesterday with my daughter and she just barely turned 18. So we're still at the pediatrician, we haven't switched yet, but anyway, it's so interesting to see, because we've been going to this doctor now since my kids were itty-bitty. And how has the waiting room changed? Okay, so it used to be, years and years ago we would all come in with our kids. There was a play area, there were toys. All the parents were pretty much engaging with the kids with books or magazines Remember magazines and there were crayons out and coloring books and there were all these things. There were toys and lots of options. It was kind of like the waiting room at the pediatrician was like a big play land or something, and of course, the kids were all sick, but that's just how it was. Everybody was interacting, it was loud, it was, you know. There was laughter and crying and singing and all kinds of stuff, singing for pediatricians Wow, yeah, well, the little guys, you know, the little kids, they're always singing. Okay, this is just the waiting area. Before you go in. This is just how it was. I was just thinking about this yesterday, how quiet the waiting room was. Why was it quiet? Because every kid was on a device. There were no coloring books, there were no crayons. That was not happening. And guess what? All the adults were on their devices too. And I just thought, okay, so this is an example of margin. We go to an appointment and we wait and I'm talking about myself too. What do we do? The first thing we do is pull out our phones, and what are we looking at? What are we thinking about when we are having that margin? It's convicting, it's embarrassing in some cases.

Speaker 1:

That made me think of another really good way of knowing if something is an idol in your life or not is to imagine setting it down for a week. Oh, yeah. I mean, like the phone. I remember Michael and I for a while, a very short while, when we were on Tattletale Island. We would, on Sundays, take a Sabbath rest from. Yes, I remember that, yeah, it was amazing how much we loved those days, but it was so hard. This connected is so hard for us. But I mean, I don't know about you, christina, but could you, if your phone, like you know, got lost, like really lost, it would take you a little while to get a new one what would happen? What? Would you be okay with that, or could you willingly even so?

Speaker 2:

I mean me too. Yeah, I mean, I have so many things on my phone now. I check my bank every day. I do all my banking on my phone. How crazy is that? But that's, most of us are doing that. What about emails? What about all my work? So much of my work is connecting with people on my phone. I could use a computer for that, though. But, then yeah, what about my brother and his doctor's appointment today?

Speaker 1:

I have to know, you know.

Speaker 2:

It's like, yeah, that would be really hard for me, really hard at this point.

Speaker 1:

Yes, Another example is could I stop drinking diet soda? I am not even willing to try One, obviously. I have so many times Well, you have tried. Yes, Many times I've been successful many times, but it's yeah, trying to deal with the moderation issue. Moderation gradually grows to not moderation. You know why do I keep returning like a dog to my vomit? you know really, and some people it's coffee. Yes, I lay down my I hate coffee, so that's not my issue. Thank you Lord, I don't have that issue. But yeah, could you lay down coffee? Could you lay down that show that has its grip. You know, sometimes I mean, maybe that's using a too liberal of I don't know a definition for idle. What do you think?

Speaker 2:

Well, really, I think an idol is anything that gets between us and the Lord, right, I mean. So if we're doing something or spending time on something to the extent that it is pulling us away from the Lord, it's cutting into our time with Him, it's not glorifying to Him. Well, yeah, then we need to look at it, and I'm talking about us too, us.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, anytime we share on these podcasts, we're looking.

Speaker 2:

It's always about us too. That's why we're sharing it. So I was talking with one of the ladies that I coached last week and she came up with this amazing list. We have this wonderful conversation about rewards and I think it really comes right into this whole piece about idols and what are we spending our time and money on, and she was very frustrated but very open and honest about how every time she has time, a margin in her day or her weekend weekends are the hardest that her mind goes right to the idol of food, and not just food, but researching about food and eating and also thinking about her body in a very negative way. And I understand that. I mean, I did that for so many years and I still fall into that sometimes. So she said that I could share this list of what a reward is not and what it is, and I just think it might hit somebody. It certainly touched my heart and it was really a great thing for me to bring to the Lord. Just so that when we have something that is like, well, is this an idol or not? I think this might help you with it or help someone with it. A reward is not a craving, an impulse, what I want in the moment, Something I will regret numbing myself, something that I grab, something temporary in her case, food outside of God's boundaries, playing on my phone for hours, sitting in front of the TV with food, spending money that I don't have I mean, the list can go on and on. Is it something that I'm looking to often when I could be going to the Lord, I could be doing something that's life giving for me, something that glorifies God. Okay, so then we have the list of rewards, and I think this is so beautiful and you know you could add to it or whatever. Is it life giving, that activity, that time that you're spending? Is it joy filled during and after? Is it soul satisfying?

Speaker 1:

Does it?

Speaker 2:

satisfy your soul. Wow, I mean, doesn't that help in this discussion? I think it does. Is it peaceful, or does it cause you even more anxiety and shame and angst or whatever? Is it lasting? Is it meaningful? Is it enjoyable, but not just in the moment? Is it pure? Wow? Is it within God's will? Is it from God? Is it valuable according to God? Is it something that I really want? Just not what I think I want. Is it worth pursuing from God's point of view? And then she ended with the truth, which is Jesus is my reward? Yeah. I don't know. Heidi, what do you think about that list? Do you think that connects in with what we're talking about? It does.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, when I look to and value, that's going to be a really good indicator of what it is that might be an idol. You know, if I am engaged in something that I'm going to regret later, well, why am I engaged in it? Does my regret not matter? The potential for regret and the other things that you mentioned tie in very well. You know. The bottom line is God wants to be supreme in our lives. He loves us so completely. Yes, he will accept no challengers and no competitors for his lordship in our lives. Yes, I mean that's a pretty intense statement those of us that have invited him to be our Lord and Savior. What is a Lord? He is to be the only thing we bow to, really his way, only his way. And the only way to keep idols out of my life is to be aware, inviting God in what influences are present in my life right now? Are they really only the things that I know? Honor God, like you were talking about, is pure obedience. What drives me Well, I could tell you right now no, I wanted to, but it's not the same to me at all.

Speaker 2:

We all struggle with these things every single day. I mean, there is not one person on this planet that doesn't struggle with these questions. But I love what you said, heidi, about God's love, because that's really what this design, his design, is all about for us to turn to him again and again and to spend time each day in gratitude and worship and praise, instead of things that are mind-numbing and bring us down and drain us. I think a lot of the times we think that maybe something isn't an idol, but we do spend an awful lot of time there, don't we? It takes some courage to look at that, I think, in our own lives. It certainly does for me.

Speaker 1:

Well, and I think it can be helpful. We often tend to be all or nothing. We think that if I lay this down, what's gonna happen? It's like the rest of my life. Maybe it's not for the rest of your life, but God wants you to put whatever it is in the place he has for it. So invite God to show you, as I need to invite God to show me. What are you calling me to right now, lord? What are you calling me to do with? Whatever that may be, that show or that book, that audible, whatever it might be? What am I called by you to do right now? I find that God doesn't often tell me never again. Not his voice for me anytime. Right. It reminds me of the garden, you know, when Satan said well, God said didn't God say no, no, he hadn't said what Satan said. He said, and he still tries to pull that on us. God told you you would never gonna be able to even touch that ever again, and that's not the case. The cases he's called me to lay this down today, right now, and that's the reality I wanna live in is obeying him in the moment.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and I think so often that word obedience, I mean, I know, for me. I don't like that word. It makes me feel like, oh, I've done something wrong or it's negative for me in some ways, but it's really not when we're looking at our loving God. That's the thing. Heidi, you said something yesterday in one of the classes that we were teaching. You said I was miserable without boundaries. Me too, absolutely. We think, oh, I don't wanna have boundaries, I don't wanna have to obey anything or anyone, I'm just gonna go my own way and that's gonna feel great. But it doesn't, it really doesn't. And we've talked so much on this podcast and in our classes and groups and curriculum about how life-giving boundaries are. If they're God's boundaries, they're good. And they bring us joy, and they bring us days that are full of good things, even if it's a difficult circumstance that we're in.

Speaker 1:

I think sometimes it's tricky to establish boundaries for myself, because I know I have bound to boundaries as idols before. That's tricky, it's like well, but I am supposed to respond and respect the boundary. Why exalt that boundary as being the way of salvation for me? It's kind of like renewing our minds is the way to transformation. Romans 12, 2 says be transformed by, not by having the right boundaries by renewing our minds. And so, for me, I have to be really careful, and I guess I tend to err on the side of being too careful, and that is careful that I don't exalt the boundaries in my life. Yes, god will call me out on that, for sure. To me that's something I wanna be aware of. But yeah, it's important that I understand that God does call me to have boundaries in my life and it's good and wonderful. I know what I wanted to address, that kinda reeling it back around to the different idols we have and tell me what you think of this. What about the skinny idol?

Speaker 2:

The idol of the thin. Yes, oh yeah, that was a big one for me for many, many years, and every so often it comes back out again and the world does a really good job at least here in the United States for sure A really good job of helping us along, helping us to think. Of course we get to choose what we think, but that somehow, being skinny, being thin, being a certain size, being a certain weight, looking a certain way, is absolutely the best thing and we better do everything in our power to get there. That is a big one.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and look at the bazillions of dollars we have spent on that endeavor over the course of the last even 10 years, bazillions of dollars. I don't have the statistics in front of me, but I've heard that the dieting industry they've got big bucks going on there.

Speaker 2:

I mean, that's what oh, absolutely, there's kind of a promise that they're gonna, like, fix whatever's wrong, and then we're gonna need them and we're gonna continue to need them, and so they make a lot of money that way. It's definitely, it's brilliant. As far as business.

Speaker 1:

When you think of thin as an idol I mean, at least for me I think of how many times did I let the idol of thin I've got to become, or whatever we want to call it a healthy size, even that a healthy size, can't it sound so virtuous, doesn't it Sounds so virtuous, more than skinny? But how many times did I let that desire, that drive to reach that place, direct my steps to the gym? Direct my steps to the gym again in the day, direct my steps for the third or fourth hour of the day I mean it's not or direct me to under eat, direct me to buy this program or this special food, or pay this coach or whatever. All my work, when I think of how much time, money, anxiety, thought, calendar and checkbook and the thoughts all the things we talked about, all of those were overflowing with thoughts of I need to get there at any cost.

Speaker 2:

It's a total idol in my life. Total idol, yeah, absolutely. I mean, really, when we look at all of this, it really comes down to relationship. It's all about us and the Lord and what is getting in between us. What are we spending our time on and what thoughts are we having about all of this? I mean, like you said, the renewing of the mind is the key. Are we thinking God's thoughts after him? Are we thinking the world's thoughts and you know, lies that we have come up with on our own?

Speaker 1:

I think that when I was at my worst as far as the skinny idol or healthy size idol, whatever, I think that I would not have even recognized an idol there.

Speaker 2:

Oh no, no me neither no, I thought I was doing exactly the right thing.

Speaker 1:

I actually thought it was godly Right. Yes, oh, seriously, though, I mean, when I think of the calendar, when I think of the checking account, when I think of the spare thoughts that went into beating myself up or gotta do, or even puffing myself up because I had done so well, or that's the idol I can relate to the most strongly in my life in the past, now in the present it would probably be something else, because I've kind of come to a place of peace with that. I mean, see, here's the thing about idols. They lie to us. I'm surprised at that place of healthy size and be fit and trim and run marathons in a single bound and all of that and still not be satisfied. God has created that human heart that John Calvin says is an idol factory. God has created that heart with a hole that is god-sized. It says in Ecclesiastes that he has placed eternity in the heart of man. And I believe that we jam all kinds of things in that hole and that's what becomes our idol. Whatever we let sit there for any time at all, it's like, well, that's serving me, that's filling that need. But it does, it ends up being empty. It ends up being like chaff in the wind.

Speaker 2:

It was a lie. It wasn't worth it.

Speaker 1:

Isaiah 4420,. Shall I bow down to a block of wood? Well, we would say no, but this person and I think I did too, and I had an idol of skinny in my life I met on ashes. It says such a person feeds on ashes. A deluded heart misleads him. He cannot save himself or say is not this thing in my right hand a lie? Isaiah 4420. That's intense. Yeah, it is.

Speaker 2:

So I think so much of this comes down to are we willing to lay this down Whatever it is and trust God for his very best. We want to make sure that we're not rationalizing oh surely God wouldn't want that, because really, if he puts his finger on it, if we're feeling that loving conviction from the Holy Spirit, we want to look at that. We don't want to ignore that. We want to ask God about that and have a conversation with him. We will be richer by far for laying it down whatever it is, if God calls us to that.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, definitely. So I would say if you've had conviction, come listening to this at all, or if you have known before that you have had idols that God was convicting you about and wants you to lay down, have some time with him, invite him in and say God, maybe it's time for us to talk about these things, and I want to hear from you and I know that your desire for me is only the very best. There might be a shift God is asking me to make, and it might be like inside of your mind, like the skinny idol is not something physical externally that you bow to, but it's a thought process that you really a value system, and it results in taking steps in all kinds of directions, but it might be something that isn't quite so complicated as that. And so ask him to show you Lord, what is it specifically? What are you asking me to do? Would you give me a heart that wants to To you, out of a love for you, because you're good and holy and loving and righteous and kind, and it is your kindness that leads me to a place of being willing to repent and obey.

Speaker 2:

Yes.

Speaker 1:

What else? What else should a person do?

Speaker 2:

I was going to say some of what you just said, so I love that you said that about his compassion and kindness, so that if you're having trouble which you know we all have trouble sometimes thinking well, I don't really want to bring this to the. Lord, think of who he is, renew your mind about who he is. He is loving, he is patient with us, you know, I mean, those kinds of things are so important. And then the next thing is Lord, what is true? Will you show me what is true about what I'm doing? Help me to renew my mind from your perspective. We want to think his thoughts after him about whatever it is. You know, maybe the idol is disguised in something so good, maybe it's, you know, a service project or something, but it has become so big in your life that it's taken over. Whatever it is, we want to invite God in to show us his thoughts, his wisdom, his insights and whatever that is, it's going to be so valuable for us to be able to move forward in relationship with him but also to have a life that is full of joy.

Speaker 1:

You know it's interesting. You mentioned it might be a service project that God puts his finger on. My kids were little. There was one year where they both did sports, and I tell you why. I don't know if that's still a thing, but being a soccer mom for more than one kid, one kid alone, was tough. Yes, I think that's one of the idols in our countries these days. I don't know how much your pin countries are elsewhere, but I know Canada and the US struggles with. This is the parents being everywhere, having their kids and everything and just go, go, go, go, go. Lessons for this and sports for that and activities for this and that. Keeping my kid busy can be an idol too, and so, like service project, it may be soccer, right, I had an idol of tennis going on. Yeah, you remember those days. So we were new, our minds, like you were saying, with who God is, yes, what is true about him, and then we do our minds about whatever it is we're struggling with, right.

Speaker 2:

Well, and then I my next go to would be who am I? Who am I in Christ? You know? Who does God say that I am? Those are kind of the big ones. What? What is true about what's going on? Who am I? Who does God say I am? And then, of course, who is God? Those are the big ones. When those things are clear and fall into place as they line up with scripture, boy, that really helps us to see what's going on and what we might need to change in our lives.

Speaker 1:

It says in the scriptures that God gives us everything we need for life and godliness. Yes, does bring conviction, and we trust him that he will give you what you need to lay down an idol. Don't box yourself into a corner where it's an all or nothing thing. Just ask God to show you what stuff do you want me to take and then welcome him to give you the desires. As you renew your mind, your desires will change and he will give you the strength to lay down whatever God says to put in his finger on for you.

Speaker 2:

Yes, we are just so glad that you've been with us today during this episode of our podcast, and we hope you'll join us next time on Revelation within on the go. See you next time. Bye, bye.

Exploring the Concept of Idolatry
Identifying and Overcoming Idols in Life
Idolatry and Setting Boundaries
Understanding Scripture and Making Personal Changes