"YIKES! The Word, 'Thin,' is OFFENSIVE!"

Speaker 1: 0:00

Hi and welcome to Thin Within on the Go. I'm Heidi Biles-Madepperson, one of your hosts and the owner and lead coach of Thin Withinorg.

Speaker 2: 0:09

And I'm Christina Motley, another one of your hosts, also a Thin Within coach and Heidi's partner in all things Thin Within. We are so, so happy to have you here today for this episode of Thin Within on the Go. On the Go. Wonderful, wonderful, so glad you're here, welcome. So, Heidi, what are we talking about today?

Speaker 1: 0:38

Well, we have heard for years people of all different ages wondering if Thin Within is right for them, or their daughters, their sons, and so on and so forth. And I just have to say when I first came to Thin Within it was 22 years ago, 23 years ago. Yeah, so I'm not telling, but I had little ones at the time And yes, it was. We ate according to hunger and satisfaction, just right size portions. I did not do something different with my kids. In fact, there is even a book that talks about it, that Judy co-authored with a pediatrician, that you might be able to find, even though it's out of print, called Raising Fit Kids in a Fat World. That's kind of offensive, isn't it? Yes, the title is offensive. Well, so is the name Thin Within, and that's something we're going to talk about.

Speaker 2: 1:34

We are going to be changing the name Thin Within. Yes, we are taking the word Thin Out Out of it.

Speaker 1: 1:42

Yes, out of the window Out Right. So in 1975, when Judy Halliday and her partner at the time began Thin Within it was the decade of Twiggy, or it was the second decade of Twiggy actually, and a really thin person that everybody wanted to emulate, it seemed like, and so the word Thin and Within was a great name for the time. But that was almost 50 years ago.

Speaker 2: 2:11

Oh my goodness, things they be a changing. Yeah, i mean, i think about that time And that is what we were all looking for back then. Corsair was really young. Well, you weren't even born yet. Yes, I was I was a little girl when Thin Within was started.

Speaker 1: 2:28

We are very aware of the fact that the name Thin Within is almost hurtful to some of us and offensive and triggering Right.

Speaker 2: 2:37

What else is?

Speaker 1: 2:38

it.

Speaker 2: 2:39

Oh my gosh. Well, especially for our younger listeners. Like you said, it's off-putting because that is not where we're going anymore.

Speaker 1: 2:50

No.

Speaker 2: 2:51

That's not the goal. We want to be comfortable in our own skin. Yes, we want to celebrate the differences in our body types and our shapes. We want to be enjoying the gifts that God has given us in our body. We want to be a healthy size, whatever that means for each person. And everybody is different. Everybody is different. All those charts and scales that tell you you should be this and you should be that We are That is not what we're about, not at all No, and we are definitely going to make that more obvious as time goes on And we will be rebranding.

Speaker 1: 3:33

So you all who are out there, you can pray that we'll have wisdom to know what it is that God wants us to rebrand to and be looking for us as we change our name, and the focus is not going to be losing weight. We want each one who comes to us to know they're in a safe space, to be who they are and who God is making you to be, and that's deeply personal, and so we hope that you're pleased with the changes as they happen. But, that being said, many of the younger folks that are out there and we're a couple of old fogies you're young and Hopefully you'll see things less and less that offend you, yes, more and more that encourage you, and so we want to, we want to be sure you know that you are, we see you, we hear you. Yes, we are eager to meet you right where you are.

Speaker 2: 4:31

Yes, Well and I'm just going to say a little side note, you know, if you are a person that is really struggling with your health because of your size, i mean we're. We're here for you as well, we are here for everyone. I know that, you know, some of the ladies that I'm coaching are really suffering and struggling, and there that is very real as well. But, we don't want to be focused on being thin or looking a certain way Right. That is not what we're after. This is a heart issue. This is a stronghold issue. That's where our focus is.

Speaker 1: 5:09

And we're not only focusing on the health of our families but also on the health of our communities, and I know that you, our audience, is aware. We know that some people and I've been in this, in this category, some people, especially as we age, we, our joints, are like struggling to carry us, and it may be something that can be helped by carrying less weight. But we're not just trying to be content and hopefully pain free, with the Lord's help. So that will continue to be something we do. But for those of you who are wondering what is about the focus of weight? that is not the focus. We can, even as lovers of the Lord Jesus, turn from our idol of overeating to an idol of Then, and we don't want to do that. In fact, that's one reason why we want to change the name. We want to change the name. The name thin within has in some ways promoted this idea that we must be thin and we're going to help you get there. That is not our mission. That has not ever been the mission to be honest with you Well at least not since I've been around in the past, right, right. And so we want you to know that you are welcome to be a part of our community, of our programs, of our coaching, whether or not you want to lose weight, we want to be a part of that. If you are somebody who needs to be free of extra pounds because of joint issues and whatnot, we will help you with that. Certainly, god is going to show you what you need, though, but we will not celebrate the idol of thin.

Speaker 2: 6:48

No, no, no, no, no. Well, and one of the things that has happened recently, i think both Heidi and I have. I think that's the thing that's been really important to me That some of our teenagers and 20s and 30, some things are very, very put off by the word thin in, thin within. I heard that just last week and it's like, actually this is exciting to me because it means that our society is pulling away More away from that idol of thin. Do you remember when all of the models Were in the same style, you know, months? I mean, that was kind of the quote unquote style for a while And it is not anymore. You go into target, for example, now, and you see all kinds of different mannequins like different sizes, different size clothes are showcased and there's pictures, different size women And there's a lot of different, different styles of clothing, beautiful pictures. I love that. I love that there is a movement in our society right now toward normal, healthy size. But we know that many of us are still very much entrenched in old dieting mentality. We are very much stuck And still owned by the scale and all of those things, and we are very much stuck in that And we are focused on working on this stronghold, working on our hearts renewing our minds, bringing all of this to the Lord so that we can walk in freedom.

Speaker 1: 8:28

It's really important, too, for us to recognize that our size Does not reflect Whether or not we are obedient to God Or better Christians. We are not being dismayed And I know some of you at listening might take issue with me saying that, but I think that we have to be really careful that we don't combine what we believe about the Lord Jesus Christ and who he is in us, his Holy spirit's work in us, with demonstrated by a physical appearance of any kind. So we really want to get away from that means lost weight, and lost weight means you've been obedient. I know that that hasn't been true in the course of my life, where there have been many times when I have lost a lot of weight, even when I was quote thin and I was no, i was not obedient to God during that season. It just happened that I was able to be a certain size because of my habits and you know, and some of us are more able to look a certain way because of genetics, because of our behaviors of some kind, and it's not necessarily indicative that we are walking a path of godliness. So let's break free of that. Let's break free of this idea that if I am truly godly, i will be thin. I don't think it's as simple as that. I don't think it's. Jesus could sit with you for five minutes. He would say to you we really need to talk about your weight, and I don't think he would say that it's time to lose weight because you're clearly not godly because of five pounds or whatever. I think that he would speak to us of his love. It isn't loving, and to attribute those kinds of thoughts to him, i think, is to misrepresent him to ourselves and to others. And so, whatever you may think about that, it's definitely worth praying and asking God about. But the thin within ministry, no matter what we call it, as we go forward, that's where we're going. It's definitely, it's where we've been, but it may not have seemed like it.

Speaker 2: 10:40

So what I love about what you're saying, Heidi, is that our worth is not dependent on our size.

Speaker 1: 10:46

Amen.

Speaker 2: 10:47

Our identity is not dependent on our size.

Speaker 1: 10:50

The world says otherwise. But the world says otherwise. What is true is no, it doesn't. What is?

Speaker 2: 10:55

true is no, and so my identity in Christ is solid and stable and sure, no matter what size I am, amen. I have been different, quite a few different sizes over my life And, as you said, heidi, it's not as simple as saying am I being obedient or not? But I know that somebody, probably a lot of people who are listening right now, might be wondering well, I mean, i eat too much out of sin, or I go to social media too much out of sin, or I am looking at the wrong things when I stream movies out of sin. It's too much of something. So what about that aspect of being overweight? What would you say to that?

Speaker 1: 11:45

Well, a lot of people overeat who aren't overweight, though too, So we need to see. It's not. It's about using my size to define something that nobody really knows. I mean, i've even said this. I've said that you know, the alcoholic might is in sin with excess. They don't wear it out on their body like I do in my excess And so I'm in sin and everybody knows it. It's like wearing an armband that's saying you know, i'm in sin. I don't believe that at this point, and the things that God has been showing me more and more is a lot of us. Our histories are a big part of the struggle we have And we're going to be talking about this for the next couple of months in effecting our, even our, ability. We are willing, but there is something in my flesh that is weak. You know, the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak And really that's what we're going to be addressing more and more is looking at. Okay, so where is that weakness so that it can be short up and strengthen? So it's true that excess is a problem in any of those areas, whether it's something that's non-caloric, if you will like right. Right. And so the question is not can I look at myself and tell if I'm loving God better or not? No, no, i don't believe that's true at all. Some people may say I know I've been eating to excess and it is because I'm not going to God with my concerns. And yeah, that's the problem. Scripture tells us again and again we don't want to do anything to excess. It's moderation that is the key. Really, god is amazing. He has created my body and your body and everybody's bodies fearfully and wonderfully, and we know that, since he is so creative and he is sovereign and he is good that my body is reliable for telling me what I need. I just need to ask him to help me listen to it and then do what I can to listen to it and let him build in me a pattern of doing that, and no matter what age I am, it has worked for me to do that. I've been able to be at peace certain seasons of my life. It will be more food and fuel that my body needs than other seasons of my life, but no matter what season I'm in, and even raising my kids, it was the same way for them that they could eat when they were hungry, didn't have to be specific about I have to eat this many fruits and vegetables every day to be healthy. They were healthy and yet we still ended up eating out, you know, a number of times each week. I don't think I'll go there, but Teenagers, same thing. They were healthy eating this way and and I know that as I've gone into menopause and now that's way in my rearview mirror It isn't. It is what's best for my body, because God gave it to us. He gave us these signals, just like he gave us signals for Mmm, i need to go potty. I better do it, not I don't, i don't Set my timer to go potty, and then I You know, and this is intended to be the same way I know when my hand is on a hot stove, i better move it, okay, so the signals in my body are remarkably Reliable for giving me signals I need for life.

Speaker 2: 15:20

So I have to tell you a little story about my son, christopher. When he was right around 10 years old, he went through this kind of stage and you've seen a lot of young boys go through this Where they're kind of not, they kind of stop growing up and they start growing out a little bit. You know what I mean and He was active and he was strong and he was healthy. But he said to me one day that he noticed that his pants were getting tight and he was just a little bit uncomfortable In his body and he was for now. Now this is a 10 year old boy. This is not someone who has any kind of Emotional baggage from years and years of you know, he had never even heard of a diet, really, because I stopped dieting just before he was born. I was still struggling with with my weight and all of that, but I kept it to myself and so he did not grow up watching me diet. Anyway, he asked me about that once and we had this very, very simple, easygoing, peaceful conversation and I said you know, we have signals in our bodies that God gave us, and he looked at me like really just Wow, let's, let's talk about that. I mean it's. It's fascinating just what, heidi, what you just said. We're cold, we put a sweater on. We're tired, we lay down and we're coughing.

Speaker 1: 16:50

We know we need something different. I mean it's it we.

Speaker 2: 16:55

We easily listen to our bodies. So in this area it's the same thing. When you feel hungry, your body is telling you, just like a car, that it needs to be fueled up and of course my son loved cars, you know all his childhood, so he really related to that. And then when you are Satisfied, you know just before full, you don't need to be full, just satisfied, just enough. That feels great. Then you stop and I said If you listen to your body signals, anything that's extra on you will just slowly fall off. And he looked at me with with his big, young, innocent eyes and said okay, That's what he did.

Speaker 1: 17:40

What He won't say. Does that mean one less twinkie than I usually get?

Speaker 2: 17:45

No, we. He was eating all a whole variety of foods and I was just letting him choose whatever. And that extra weight just fell off in the next few months and he was back to feeling like he was very comfortable in his body. It wasn't that he was unhealthy at the time He was strong, he was healthy, he was active But he could just tell that he had a little extra on his frame and it wasn't comfortable for him.

Speaker 1: 18:15

Well, i think that's the key. It wasn't comfortable for him And that's where he said that to you. If we could take on the simplicity of a child and look at it that way, am I comfortable And is it something that I can do something about? Do I want to do something about it? I mean, he clearly came to you. He was a really good example of humility and of trust, all those things, and we can go to God with it that way and say, lord, i'm kind of uncomfortable, what do you want me to do? I'll trust you with whatever you suggest.

Speaker 2: 18:52

Yes, and there was no scale involved. We didn't have a scale, there was no counting or numbers or measuring There was nothing. It was just so beautifully simple Just listen to your body's signals and that's it And let go of the rest. So I love that story because, like you said, Heidi, this is us with the Lord. We can just go to the Lord and say I need help with this, What are you asking of me? And if we can become more childlike, like you said, if we can kind of go back and simplify, what am I really doing here? I'm listening to my body And that's a very, very good, wonderful, life-giving thing to do.

Speaker 1: 19:41

When we have issues with emotions or other reasons that we eat.

Speaker 2: 19:44

we bring those to the Lord. So it's a beautiful process And I love thinking about Chris and his big eyes at that age, 10 years old looking at me like, oh, and I wish, when I was 10, that somebody had told me that.

Speaker 1: 20:02

I think what has happened with the whole idea of waiting for hunger and stopping when satisfied, and the programs, if you will, that teach, that is, the dieters in the world who got fed up with dieting, and I was one of them.

Speaker 2: 20:17

Yeah, me too.

Speaker 1: 20:18

I have turned to this. I've heard it called attuned eating. So my intuitive or attuned eating, or mindful eating, whatever you call it. I think with the mass exodus of dieters out of the dieting culture, they've brought some of that culture with them into attuned eating, intuitive eating, et cetera, and have then projected their goals and their desires into whether it's thin within or the actual intuitive eating program and so on, and so I think that's where things get murky, and then you add to it this name that we have of thin within and that really murkifies it all.

Speaker 2: 21:02

Yeah, it murkifies. We are changing that name. Well, heidi and I both we've talked on this podcast about how we did that when we first came to thin eating, we didn't know, each other, but we were doing the same thing turning it into a diet, a list of rules to follow and not finding transformation or lasting change at all. So I mean, i did that I was absolutely coming out of the dieting world, dieting mentality, and then walked right into thin within and tried to make it into a diet. That's what I did.

Speaker 1: 21:37

And we just weren't new listener to know that our intention is not to superimpose all of the values from the dieting culture over the top of what we share and teach or any other intuitive eating program teaches, whatever it. Our desire is to just Be free and to be at peace in our bodies And with food. Really, whatever that takes for you. Maybe you're a person who is going to happily not look like the cultural expectation. You're not gonna look like what has been on magazine covers for years. That's fine. Are you at peace? That's what I think God really wants us to break free from this cookie cutter approach of no peace is only gonna be found When you look like this stamp. You know, i think God can give us peace And it's just. We want to listen to him and set aside our own expectations and the values. You know we may have Established values in our lives that are really out of the culture that we're in. You know the scripture that we quote a lot about renewing our minds. That's Romans 12 to, but Romans 12 one. I mean, if you back up, present your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God, which is your spiritual worship, do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world But be transformed by the renewing of your mind. We are going to bring the values of our culture into our Christian lives, into whatever we do, unless We're very intentional not to so. We just want to say we know that, we hear you, we see you and we want to support you as you Continue on this journey to be at peace with food eating in your body, whatever that might look like for you and for your daughters and sons, and for your grandkids and nieces and nephews and your grandma.

Speaker 2: 23:40

She's welcome to everybody's welcome, everybody's welcome, and then I'll just add the. The other piece that is so freeing to me is the the issue of Health issues. Whatever your mobility is, whatever your health issue is, this works for you too. You know, you don't have to be a certain amount of active. You can come and do this approach absolutely no matter what is happening with your body right now. Right now we are seeing that with all kinds of people right now in our coaching, in our groups, 101 coaching, and it's so much fun. It's so exciting to see everybody can do this teenagers, 20s, 30s, generation, z generation, xyz, xyz.

Speaker 1: 24:33

If you have a chronic illness, you can do this and, yeah, in fact it can be. Your body might thank you for it and your spirit might too. Because I mean one thing we don't need, when we are struggling with a chronic illness or an injury I'll say that as well Yeah, to put these expectations on ourselves, to eat this way and not that way. You know, something I have mentioned before, and I'll go ahead and mention it now because it does seem applicable is when we put that kind of Expectation on ourselves, we actually have a stress response to that. Our cortisol is released into our systems and our body is released into our system And our bodies slow the metabolism because it's like you're putting pressure. I can't eat that, i've got to eat this. Oh, i shouldn't have eaten that. That just it. Our bodies respond with cortisol and all those things that go along with stress. So our bodies don't know if we're being chased by a guy with a gun or a woman with a gun, whatever, whoever, or if we're just putting pressure on ourselves. They were, our bodies were wired for peace, and when we And we're going to be talking more about the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous systems in the days ahead, i'm going to be geeking out, i think, but that's another story. But since we were wired for peace, our bodies work best when we lighten up, and I mean attitude wise. You know this, I have to do this way, or that I have to do that way. Your body will thank you if you lighten up on it really well.

Speaker 2: 26:03

Well, isn't it just a relief to know that you don't have to be afraid of whatever season is coming next in your life A job change, or a health change, or an age change? Oh, doesn't it age going into menopause? I mean, i know so many people that are afraid. I'm afraid to get older, i'm afraid of this illness that I might get, i'm afraid of this, i'm afraid of menopause, i'm afraid of, after all those things. It's like you know what we don't have to fear. I mean, yes, life is hard and throws us a lot of curveballs, myself included, but we don't have to fear. We can listen to our bodies, we can lean into the Lord for everything else that we need emotionally, spiritually and we're going to be just fine. This is such a beautifully balanced approach and, like you said, heidi, we were wired for Shalom, we were wired for peace. Our God is a God of order, not chaos. He's a God of peace. I love that about in within, or whatever we're going to call it going forward. I love that about this approach.

Speaker 1: 27:17

It's for everyone It is. It really is. Well, yay, i hope that y'all have been encouraged and, again, we could use your prayers as we change the name and rebrand and do all that, and if any of you are experts at that sort of thing and want to not charge us, that would be how we could use your help.

Speaker 2: 27:35

Absolutely Send us your ideas.

Speaker 1: 27:37

Yes, yeah, that would be awesome. Thanks for joining us.

Speaker 2: 27:40

Yes, thanks for being here on this episode of In Within.

Speaker 1: 27:47

Bye, bye for now.